you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
