i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Randomize
