The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
