But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Randomize
