Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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