so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
she peed on how many people?
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
