i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Randomize
