u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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