shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
