some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
