Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
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