i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Randomize