Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Sorry my hands just texted you
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
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