where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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