i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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