My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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