U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize