Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
