so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
