8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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