Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Randomize
