i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
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