is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
We have so much sex to catch up on
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
