This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
