talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
