Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
