Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Randomize