There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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