I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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