They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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