You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize