He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Randomize