you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
