Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
