i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Randomize
