I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
