I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
