I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
