party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
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