You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
