peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize