its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
