Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize