I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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