You're completely useless in the revolution.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
