y did u give ur computer a hand job?
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I think my nap took me to another dimension
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
