Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
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