Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize