I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
It's Friday. Sex?
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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