i would punch a child for taco bell
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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