he shaved USA in his pubs
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
