So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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