so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize